Barely Breathing
by AshlovaticLoveShiara
Summary: Barely Breathing is the Next Chapter Following Rescue In my Shenko Story.


She was out cold.  
He picked her up in his arms tears running down his face, he couldn't believe it.  
He was so close, she was right there but he was too late.  
Kaidan ran back to the Normandy after realizing that the Commander was still breathing but really faintly, there was still hope she needed medical attention and soon. The airlock of the Normandy open in front of him he ran "Is she okay?" ignoring Joker's question he went straight to the elevator to the crew deck which the ride down seemed like it was taking hours...  
Kaidan put her down on one of the bed and he fell to the ground next to her praying that she would survive..  
Dr. Chakwas rushed to the Commander's side with omni-gel, bandages, gaze, pain killers and everything. She did what she could but Shepard was going to need more than what the Dr. Could give her on the Normandy they needed to get to the Citadel rumors had it that the Citadel had only taken slight damage. And that the hospital was fully operational it was their only hope. Dr. Chakwas told Joker to head to the citadel that had been moved back into its original location. And then looked down at Kaidan who was curled up in a ball on the ground crying.

"She'll make it Kaidan I promise..." Trying to comfort him,

but he wasn't listening he was in his own mind, replaying the time they shared together in his mind. Liara and Garrus came in to check on Shepard and to Comfort the distressed Lt. Commander. Liara tried to reassure him,

"Kaidan The Commander is strong she will hold in there, she will make it. Goddess watch over her.." She wasn't sure if he heard her.

" Kaidan she will be fine. There was nothing you could of done."

"You don't get it Liara! It's my fault! I wasn't fast enough, she... If she dies... It's... It's my fault!"  
He said almost yelling at her, Kaidan was so mad at himself, it was his fault his loved one was going to die, he couldn't save her. He should of been there with her, maybe he could of saved her, maybe he could of taken her place...  
Liara was shocked at his words wrapping her arms around Kaidan trying to comfort him only to be pushed away.  
Garrus told her not to be hurt by his gesture that he was only mad at himself and not her.

"Kaidan it's not your fault there wasn't anything you could do! If it wasn't for you she wouldn't be here, she wouldn't even have a chance right now!"

Garrus told him trying to convince His friend that he did all he could have. But Kaidan made up his mind, he wasn't going to listen to anyone.. He just wanted to be alone without saying a word he left the med bay and headed to the elevator his head down tears still running down his cheeks. Walking out into the Commanders Cabin made him break down even more, the room still smelled like her a scent that used to comfort him that now only haunted him.. He slowly made his way to the bed that they had last shared a moment together before hitting Earth the last good memory he had of her. Taylor's N7 jacket was still laying on the floor next to the bed right where he threw it after ripping it off her that night.. Slowly picking up the jacket in his hands he placed it on the bed and laid down next to it staring up at the ceiling of the ship, numb not crying anymore but not happy either just numb without a feeling other then the emptiness in his heart..  
He would give anything to see her wake up again... His eyes gradually started to shut.  
He had fallen asleep without even realizing it. When he finally opened his eyes again something felt odd, he felt someone laying next to him, Kaidan lifted himself to take a look at who it was and by his surprise Shepard was laying next to him, the Lt. Commander was Shocked just a moment ago she was almost dead how... How could she be sleeping next to him? Taylor rolled on top of him and kissed him in responds Kaidan kiss her back...  
But in a blink of an eye she was gone and he was alone in bed. It was just a dream a really realistic one at that.  
He turned and looked at the clock on her desk he had been sleeping for a few hours..  
He was upset with himself how could he sleep when the woman he loved was on the verge of death?  
"ETA 15 minutes to the citadel." Joker said over the com.  
Kaidan approach the elevator right as the door open he could see Garrus was waiting for him.  
"How are you holding up?" He said in a worrisome voice, his arms reaching out to give the Lt. a hug looking at his grieving squad mate.

After a few moments Kaidan returned the hug, he could feel tears travel down his face.

"Not too well.." The elevator door opened again Kaidan broke the hug and headed towards the med bay.

"How is she Doctor?" His eyes fixed his lover laying stiff on the bed before him, she was pale covered in bandages but alive and that was good enough for now.

"She is.. Well she is alive, her breathing is getting better and she seems to be regaining a little bit of strength I've done everything I can for her.. Most people would of died after all the injuries but not her.."

Those words gave him hope a faint smile started to grow on his faint but slowly faded away.

He couldn't take his eyes off her, he could see her draw every breathe the distance between each one wasn't natural, but at least she was breathing.  
The Normandy came to a halt and without a moment to waste a medical team boarded the ship with a stretcher in hand rushing to get to the Commander. They carry her on to the citadel which had seen better days but as the catalyst had promised the damage was minimal. They rushed her to Huerta memorial hospital, Kaidan followed them closely the hospital was full but they made room for the hero of the galaxy.

"We barely have a pulse here and I've never seen someone breathe like this! How is she still Alive!?"  
"She is Commander Shepard. She died once and that didn't stop her." Kaidan said almost upset at the words the paramedic had just said.  
The commander was brought to the ICU. Kaidan followed them into the room when a salarian doctor came up to him.

"I'm sorry but I'm going to have to ask you to wait in the waiting area." Kaidan's blood started to boil he couldn't leave her! How could he? Did this Salarian really think he would just leave her side even for a moment!?

"I know this isn't easy but she is in good hands here."

"I can't leave her.. Not after all of this. I just can't! I lost her once I'm not going to lose her again!" He couldn't leave her. He wanted to stay right there beside her. He couldn't bear to lose her again.  
Just the thought of losing her brought tears to his eyes. His frustration turned into sadness and despair. He glanced over at Taylor surrounded by a group of the best medical professionals in all the galaxy, he knew deep down that she was in good hands.

"Okay. If there is anything please let me know. Take care of her. Please" And he slowly left her room...


End file.
